happy halloween

ok. since it's HALLOWEEN (or All Hallow's Eve...or Samhain, or whatever you fuckers want to call it), i thought i'd talk about scary movies. i love 'em. so here are, in no particular order (since i can't seem to make up my mind which ones i like most), my favorite movies of the genre:

poltergeist. "they're heeeeere." this is the movie that started my fear of clowns. and dolls. and clown dolls. it was back when "built over an old indian burial ground," didn't sound so cliched. i love everything about the movie, and i'm sure i know it word for word. "the swimming pool, THE SWIMMING POOL!!"

the exorcist. this was the first horror movie i ever watched. i might have been five. as scary as it seemed then, it's twice as frightening to me now. the scene that makes me cringe every time is the first time Regan's head turns backwards. "Do you know what she did, your cunting daughter?" *shiver* creepy. i've got the newer version now, with the scenes that had been cut from the original. best cut scene: regan's upside-down crabwalk down the stairs. it is oh-so-spooky.

halloween. my favorite slasher series. um. except for the last few, those suck. and not the third one either, that has nothing to do with michael myers. the first two are classics. i'm not a huge slasher flick fan anymore, now that my movie tastes have (for the most part) matured, but these never get old. jamie lee curtis is the scream queen.

pet sematary. another movie i know word for word. "sometimes, dead is bettah." it's the best stephen king movie ever. Zelda gave me nightmares. and daymares. the death scene where Gage (the little boy) gets hit by a truck always makes me bawl like a retard, but i have to say, Gage is the cutest dead kid ever. "First I played with Jud and then mommy came and I played with mommy. We had an awful good time. Now I want to play with yoooooooou."

the ring. when i first saw this movie, i was alone in the dark. when the dead chick popped out of the dude's TV, it scared the beejeezus out of me. i had gotten a movie poster of it from my work and had stuck it up in my bedroom prior to watching it, just because it looked cool. it was just a well. after seeing the movie, i had to take it down because i couldn't sleep with it up. i was convinced that creepy little chick was going to hop on out of the poster when i was sleeping. any movie that can do that to me, it's worth watching.

white noise. immediately after seeing this movie in theaters, i went out and got myself a digital voice recorder to try to collect my own EVPs (electronic voice phenomena). never got any, but anyways, the movie still slays. plus michael keaton is beautiful. when his wife died in the movie, i just wanted to jump through the screen and hug him. on top of being a really creepy ghost story, it's also got a kinda sweet love story in it, too. it's just a really awesome, haunting movie.

the amityville horror. it's the classic haunted house flick. i love the original, because it's what i grew up watching. i love the newer remake because of the wicked effects (for example, there is a baby sitter's finger poking in a dead girl's brain-hole effect, who couldn't love that). i've seen mass amounts of documentaries on the "true" story behind it all and it is utterly fascinating. for more about the amityville horror, go to the Amityville Horror Official Website, or go to The Amityville Murders for more information about the DeFeo murders. once you see the truth behind this movie, it makes it all the creepier.

love object. this isn't exactly the scariest movie, but it is damn strange, and definitely worth watching. it's a horror movie about a socially inept man and his relationship with his jealous, anatomically accurate silicone sex doll. if that doesn't make you want to watch it...then you are lame.

signs. three things that slay in one movie. aliens, destiny/fate, and of course, joaquin phoenix. they don't show much of the aliens, which, IMO is awesome because they don't overdo it. there is a lot of illogical whatnot where the aliens are concerned, but it doesn't really matter to me (since i'm not a logical person, anyway) plus the aliens are not even the point of the movie. it's got all these odd coincidental occurrences all throughout the movie and they all have purpose. and if that's not enough, there's joaquin phoenix's scar. good times.

silence of the lambs. this movie has some of my favorite lines. "It rubs the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again. Yes, it will, Precious, won't it? It will get the hose!" buffalo bill slays. literally ;) the movie doesn't scare me near as much as it used to, since i've seen it a kajillion times. i watch it now to see buffalo bill dancing around with his whatnot tucked in (to the song ''Goodbye Horses'' by Q. Lazzarus, it took me forever to find the name of that song) pretending to be a woman.

the entity. based on a "true" story. a woman getting raped by a ghost. or demon, or whatever. at times, i think it's more funny than scary, but i've got a pretty twisted sense of humor. all i can say, is that the whole movie is worth watching just for the boob scene alone. there's supposed to be a remake of this one coming out next year, so i've heard, so i am hoping it is more graphic. *ahem* i mean better.

and, on a slightly different note, i thought my most favorite halloween show ever was worth mentioning. Garfield's Halloween Adventure. sure, i know it seems childish, but go fuck yourself, i love this show. more than any scary movie ever made, this gets me into the halloween spirit. and it's where i first heard one of my most favorite words to say: flibberdegibbet. i just realized it's a real word, BTW, stupid me thought it was nonsense all this time, but it's in the dictionary. it means, "a flighty person." i learn a new bit of useless trivia every day.