Thoughts, Nonsense, Neurosis, Boom

Saturday, December 27, 2003

I have joined the 21st century!

Well, I finally have a DVD player.

Right now I'm watching Kermit's Swamp Years in portuguese.
Ahh...the possibilities.

Sunday, December 14, 2003

Everyone Stop What You're Doing!

Because I have a new favorite song.
Or entire soundtrack album for the matter and it's

~~~ Hedwig and the Angry Inch ~~~

And this is very important.
I think so.
But feel free to comment only if you agree with me.

It's a very lickable voice.

Sunday, November 30, 2003

Day After Thanksgiving $4 HOUR SALE$

After Friday, November 28, 2003, I have lost all faith in the general intelligence of human beings. SHEEP! (ahem) To all of you that wake up at 4 in the morning and wait for 2 hours at the doors of any retail establishment to save $5 on a DVD player, G-E-T A L-I-F-E.

I walked to work in the freezing cold, with a cold and tonsilitis and a fever of 101, no less, because I knew there was no way to get out of work unless I was on my death bed, AT 5:30 IN THE MORNING in the dark only to get to work and have to wear a humiliating santa hat and be trampled by idiots who will buy anything they see in the newspaper ads. It was a tragedy, let me tell you.

Oh, but no...I'm not bitter...

Saturday, November 15, 2003

Monday, November 03, 2003

A Load Off

So, y'know, it dawned on me.
I'm moving in like 7 months.
Before I am eligible for another raise at work.
So why the hell am I working so hard? It's not like I truly care how that store looks. So I only need to work hard enough not to get fired.
I feel so free.

I think I scratched my eye or something. It's all itchy.
Or I might have pinkeye. You know what that leads to.
That's the first step to becoming a brain eating zombie. Boo-ya!

I am so having karaoke withdrawal. *ROXANNE...*
Fakey fish tanks are so awesome. Right now my plastic jellyfish is riding one of the other plastic fish like a horsey. Yee-haw. The plastic seahorse looks jealous...

Thursday, October 30, 2003

Mama needs some shuuuugah.

I don't know ka-ra-te
But I know cah-ray-zah.

You know, if I actually followed through on every impulse I've had to take out my aggressions on anyone who even mildly annoyed me, there would be a trail of blood and gore behind me everywhere I went. Like the world has never seen, man.
Boo-ya.

Not that I would...you know...

Monday, October 27, 2003

The Beauty, the Splendor, the Wonder...

I've been listening to the Hair soundtrack like nonstop. I feel all dramatic.
Why can't people just break out in dance and song for no reason?
Man...
Life needs a soundtrack.

Saturday, October 25, 2003

Hair and Karaoke

Man, I never post on my blog anymore.
I better stop having a life...

Davey's 2 new favorite movies: Nightmare Before Christmas and *grin* Hair. Damn good taste and only 3 years old. Only obvious which mommy pooped him out. I tried to grow his hair out, but it aint thick enough. I guess he'll have to flow it and show it when he gets a little older.

My new favorite karaoke song: Maggie May. Man, I rock that song. Boo-ya.



Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Pointless one word entry.

sigh

Tremblin in my sandals

Change is good. It's a good thing. I need to step out of my comfort zone if I'm ever going to get what I want...
Ok, Jenny, repeat that over and over until you believe it.

Monday, October 06, 2003

Damn this technology.

Why is my computer the moodiest when I am on? No one else seems to have a problem with it...
I am getting the feeling that technology is out to get me.
Or at least just messin with me.
grr...

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Drivel

I am a chip floating in the salsa of life.
I am...a lump in the mashed potatoes called life.
I am the, um....the um...hemmoroid in the uh....
Ew.
Ok, that's disgusting...

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

The Lack Of Something Happening

I'm sitting on my ass in life like I'm waiting for something so happen. I'm pluggin away at my crappy job getting paid too little and drinking on occasion and I try writing a story and I get a chapter ways through and quit and sit down and wait some more.
Then I write a blog about it. And whine.
I need to be slapped.
So I'm sittin around waiting for someone to slap me. At least that's a goal...

Thursday, September 25, 2003

Denny's 2:25AM 7/18/03 (or The Antihero Diaper)

No pens
Leaky diapers and
bouncing mountains
(or hills)
For staring
dark haired boy
-Who's yo daddy-
Thumbing thru memories
scribbling more
fragmented
Between refills & oldies
Hilly/mountainous/hilly/mountainous
mole hilly
We stand for
sexually frustrated women
everywere
Suck it up straight girl.

(this poem will only make sense to 3 poeple. unless i explain it. which i won't)

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

Winnie the Pooh

I have watched Piglet's Big Movie about 45 times, no kidding. Thank you to my 3 year old son. It started depressing me the more I watched it.
Winnie the Pooh is lazy, fat, and illiterate. He takes Piglet for granted and constantly belittles him, when at least Piglet knows how to read.
Tigger needs Ritalin. I know ADHD when I see it.
Eeyore is depressed and suicidal. He is also homeless (not that it matters...)
Rabbit is anal retentive and racist. He can't accept anyone. I think he has a carrot up his ass.
Owl should've died a long time ago.
The only characters I have any respect for are Piglet, Kanga (single mother, woo hoo!), and Roo.
Now that I've proven that I have no life....

Monday, September 15, 2003

About You. All You.

This is a blog about CV. YOUYOUYOUYOUYOU.
ALL YOU.

HAPPY?

How to Look Smart

1. Wear smart-glasses (normally round and small, wire rims)

2. During conversation, nod after key points (when the other person says something and gets excited) and say, "Exactly..." Make sure you trail off.

3. Same as #2, but if you want to deflate the person's ego, say, "I beg to differ." Instead of trailing off, walk away before they can ask any questions.

4. Quote from books. It really doesn't matter what. I have quoted from Calvin & Hobbes with a positive reaction. Garfield works as well.

More tips to come after I have the opportunity to test them out...

Sunday, September 14, 2003

Customers (for anyone who's worked in retail)

Mortal dread
Casual blank eyed sheep
pass and pass and again
stop & stare in dumb recognition
as their questions & nonsense
pour out like nosebleed
--which if comprehended could
(quite possibly)
make one dumber--
followed by the eternal silence
as they stand in wait
for me to read their mind.

Saturday, September 13, 2003

Sappy, I Know.

Forgive these
dark circles under my
eyes, I've been
visiting with my pillow
who
(oddly enough)
turns into you
come midnight
whispering magic
into my dreams

Dream

The greatest dream I had recently.
I was in a car with John Travolta. We were driving around in the parking lot of a Friendly's (which I actually haven't seen one of those since I was back east) and he was teaching me how to drive a stick shift.

While I'm on the subject, the strangest dream.
I had this dream during the week after my grandfather (PaPa) died, I think about 8 years ago...
My family, my grandparents, the Brady Bunch and myself were driving into The City (which city? don't know). We finally parked in front of a very tall, very skinny building which had no doors, but a metal ladder hanging on the side. The group of us climbed up the ladder, and when we all made it to the top we all threw frisbees for a bit, then climbed down. On the car ride home (Brady Bunch still in tow) we got stuck in a traffic jam in the middle of this huge tunnel. Well, that made my PaPa mad, so he got out of the car, climbed onto the roof of the nearest vehicle, then started stomping around, poking holes in the car with his (ahem) spike heels.
After the tunnel fiasco, we headed toward The Country where there was a balcony overlooking the city and I discussed politics with a talking frog.

More dreams to come, I'm sure.

My Last Prayer

Twilight
I uncap pour out
blanketed wishes loves tortures
show my seedy insides to the stars
smooth in my skin
Welcome the voyeurs of the night
I'm shedding down to my childhood
exposing my achilles with a smirk
Aint no angel down here
Underbelly of white and gooseflesh from
the cold bite of indifference
I track my cheeks salty as
Heaven turns it's back.