Thoughts, Nonsense, Neurosis, Boom

Sunday, February 13, 2005

the phantom pager

just got done watching a movie (yes, a scary one) and walked into my room. when i turned on the lamp next to my bed, davey's toy pager went off. i never touched it, nothing fell on it, nothing around it, the batteries don't seem to be running down. i freaked out and for a minute, was convinced there was a ghost hanging around my bed. bloody awesome. my own ghost.

oh, sure, it's not like the horror movies i watch and the ghost book i read every night have anything to do with my state of mind. HA. but for real, what i'd like to do is get a digital recorder and try some of that EVP. see if there's any reason for me to believe in anything. i'm so up in the air about everything, it would be nice to have some sort of proof that there's something happening after death. right now, as much as i freak out about ghosts and whatnot, i still believe that when we die, we're gone. nothing. zip. ka-put. it's not exactly comforting, but unlike some people, i can't sit and lie to myself just because i'm afraid of death.

so far, aside from tonight's phantom pager experience, i've had no reason to believe in the existence of ghosts. but i keep my mind open to the possibility. i WANT to be proven wrong. i WANT to venture out into a cemetery some night and have a ghost scare the living fuck out of me. that would SLAY. and when i die, i would love to haunt people. mess with their heads. i could go through eternity just fuckin with people. good times.

**update: i was watching Kissing a Fool the same night (aaah, jason lee) on one of the movie channels, when the TV channel changed to an infomercial. i thought i had rolled over the remote, but it was sitting on my video cabinet (where the toy pager was sitting when it went off). am i being haunted? woooooo.....

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