lazy day, lazy me

so, i'm not up to much. not a lot to blog about, but i figure if i just keep writing, something intelligent will come out of it. or possibly not.

today's breakfast: dry corn pops and beer.
today's lunch: cheez-its and coffee.
mmm. life is good.

i've been digging through my old poetry journals and found one from high school. it was good for a few laughs, maybe there was one or two that could pass for good at two in the morning. it's scary how right after i wrote them, i thought they were good. it makes me think, what will i think of the poetry i'm writing now, like, in 10 years or so? i don't normally post them on my poetry page unless i believe there might be at least a shred of decent in them. maybe i'm just fooling myself. i need to get out more, though. i need more to write about.

i saw this...um. somewhere, and thought it was amusing.
Why Geeks and Nerds Are Worth It...
and from experience, most all of it is true. although, i'm a geek, myself. haha.

i opened my Kelloggs Corn Pops yesterday and got an awesome red lightsaber spoon:


i feel ultra nerdy, since i never get corn pops, unless there is a badass lightsaber spoon prize inside.

i will always be a kid.

my yahoo 360 blog

so i finally decided to try out Yahoo! 360°. so far, it's great, other than the fact that you can't change the layout or colors or anything. every page looks the same. *yawn* although i do like the friends aspect (sorta like livejournal) in that you can pick and choose what friends see what posts (i think, if i read right, i have yet to mess with that, as i've only got 2 friends on there so far).

but anyways...

i hate it when the punk kids up the street start screaming. at almost 2 in the morning. my brother called the police. again. blah. it's funny how i'm now calling teenagers "punk kids," i'm too young for that, i think. it's ok, i make up for my crotchetiness (is that even a word...) by watching blues clues.

speaking of family programming, i saw Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events tonight. it was pretty good, although through the whole movie my brother kept saying "can you believe that's jim carrey? it doesn't even look like him..."

what crack is he on. (that was more of a statement, i think, than a question). any movie jim carrey is in I CAN ALWAYS TELL IT'S HIM because he always acts like a complete BABOON'S ASS. i didn't even have to hear him talk. he plays the same character in every movie: BABOON'S ASS. but aside from that, it was a great movie. i'm trying to find the darker family/children's movies for davey so i have someone to watch horror movies with when he gets older, dammit.

my taste in music (a quizzy)

Your Taste in Music:

90's Alternative: Highest Influence

80's Alternative: High Influence

90's Rock: High Influence

Adult Alternative: High Influence

Alternative Rock: High Influence

Classic Rock: High Influence

Punk: High Influence

80's Pop: Medium Influence

90's Pop: Medium Influence

80's Rock: Low Influence

90's R&B: Low Influence

Heavy Metal: Low Influence

Progressive Rock: Low Influence

How's Your Taste in Music?

fetus cloud and a pin up quiz

i was just outside and saw this big cloud that looked like a human fetus. but then a plane flew through it.

and i saw this pin up quizzy on lewie's blog (wait that sounds weird, haha, but it wasn't about him, it was about his wife) and thought why not...

You're Bettie Page!

You are Bettie Page: good girl/bad girl, beach bunny/dominatrix, saint/sinner. You are an image chameleon, but you never lose your charm. Your devilish smile shines through every time. Keep 'em guessing, girl.

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i guess this is a nice way of saying i'm fucking nuts.

college dream

another wacky dream for y'all...

::jenny's dream sequence::

i was back in community college, only taking 2 classes. my calculus prof was my high school bio teacher (scary dude that i always thought resembled a rat), and my psych prof was kevin anderson, who played ben, the cute drama teacher guy from Sleeping With the Enemy. i accidentally went to my psych class 3 times in one day (haha, wonder why). some guy in psych made a presentation about why he thought the prof was the antichrist, and he had all these overhead slides from the movie Sleeping With the Enemy of him dancing with Julia Roberts (though i'm not sure how that was supposed to prove his point). mandy (my bestest friend) was there, and i would walk around and talk to her between classes, and for some reason, it was dark out.

there was a big gym with a ramp going up it, and one of my male friends (though i don't remember who) had to lead this college tour for a group of starving third world children who were all wearing loincloths. so i started walking and talking with him and when i looked back, i realized the children were sneaking away from him and running back into the gym.

::end of dream sequence::

kind of a lame dream, but for some reason, the whole part with the psych presentation about the prof being the antichrist had this sort of...ugh, i don't know...conspiracy feel to it. that's the only way i can describe it. like maybe he really was some evil guy. but see, in the dream, that just made him hotter.

ha. try and find any of this shit in a dream dictionary.

wonder showzen

i adore this show. i found it on MTV2 when i was flipping through channels one friday night. at first i thought it was a kids show (it sorta looks like sesame street with all the puppets and kids) but after a few seconds i realized i had to shoo davey out of the room. toooootally not for kids. and less politically correct than south park. here's some of the segments, so you know what i'm talking about:

"D.O.G.O.B.G.Y.N." :Watch this lovable canine obstetrician perform a c-section in mid-air.

"Finger Force" :Watch what happens when young girls empower themselves with their fingers. WATCH IT (windows media)

watch a teaser HERE (windows media)

Wonder Showzen airs Fridays at 9:30pm ET on MTV2.

dreaming. of pink jelly shoes.

i'm starting to get back into writing my dreams out as soon as i wake up. last few times i've done this was my charlie sheen dream and my machete man nightmares. this one's from last night.

::jenny's dream sequence::

my dad ate a 5 year old package of oriental flavor ramen and got disgusted so we all went to wal mart but once we got there i was mortified because i realized i was still wearing my pajamas but i didn't notice until i took my sweater-jacket off.

i was looking at pink jelly shoes (the kind i used to wear when i was, like, 6) and got mad because they only had a size 9 in mens (mens????) and then for some reason i got all exited over these plain white canvas doctor scholl's shoes with the gel insert in them, and i thought i know the gel insert didn't work when i tried them before, but maybe they'll work better if they're in actual doctor scholl's shoes.

then, i don't know if this is later on in the same dream or just a different dream, i was walking through old town winchester but it was like a war zone and there were police everywhere and gangsta looking dudes shooting and lighting firecrackers but i had to walk through it to get home, so i decide the best way to go would be to just walk directly through this shootout in the road, or it might've been the walking mall. so i start walking through and the shooting stops and the gangstas and the police just stare at me as if i'm dangerous.

at one point i heard the police whisper "i think she's concealing fireworks" and i realize they must think my snickers bar is a weapon and i get scared that they'll shoot me so i just hold my hand up (snickers and all) and walk the rest of the way through, and when i get to the crossroad (i am now up against a building shimmying to the street, ready to run the rest of the way home), i look around the corner of the building and there is this big butch woman with a buzz cut and a gun telling me she's got my back and to run for it.

::end of dream sequence::

best new way to waste time...

more useless than quizilla...

more addictive than the south park character maker...

almost as utterly awesome as my blog...



20Q.net!!

go. now. waste time. and let the good times be had by all.

demotivations and south park me

i need to make this into a card and send it to someone. there's a whole lot of these "demotivations" here, along with an awesome screensaver (costs about $15, but there's a limited freeware version also), coffee mugs, calendars, whatever. they are hilarious.

so i've been messing with this south park character generator for a while and i seem to have finally come up with the best cartoon represtation of me. behold my glory!

breaking news.

the meeting of the ice cream cones on popsicle sticks is now underway.

the amityville horror (2005)

very, very awesome.

i mean, i've always liked the original(1979), but...this new one actually made me jump. it had a whole different feel than the original, which had just an overall creepiness and you really had to just imagine the evil without seeing it. the new one has plenty of visual gore and nastiness. no more are there silly blinky-red-eyes-in the window effects. there's skank-babysitter's-finger-poking-in-dead-girl's-brain-hole effects, but i won't spoil anymore. gawd, that was a great movie.

AND I GOT TWIZZLERS AT THE MOVIE THEATER! YAAAAAAAY!

---

here's the real amityville house, then and now:


ALSO, CHECK THIS STUFF OUT:

The Amityville Murders Website: The story behind the haunted house and murders.

The Amityville Horror Website: Hosted by George Lutz. This is the OFFICIAL website for "The Amityville Horror." This website has no affiliation with any movie projects.

three reasons why betty white slays.

-from the movie Lake Placid

the maxx

yay me! i finally ordered The Maxx (MTV cartoon from '96) series from amazon. i've been wanting this forever, started pricing it before this past christmas but it was unavailable new through amazon and the used copies were hella expensive. i checked today and someone had a "good" copy for $15. hey, as long as it plays, i'm a happy girl. and because i'm too happy...and lazy, to write a little "review" or whatever i've been doing here, here's a review of it from amazon (even though i KNOW the series is hella awesome because i watched them when they were on MTV):

Simon Kieth's popular comic book was adapted for television in this multipart animated series first broadcast on MTV. A little confusing, the series--which concerns a kind of hulking superhero and his attachment to a female therapist and her teenage client--is actually mesmerizing and surprisingly touching. The writing is unusually sophisticated, and Kieth's ability to create complex female characters and provide their incisive dialogue should be the envy of any male scribe. Parallel action set in a so-called outback--an escape from reality--is wild and evocative of childhood fantasies. This is a strangely beautiful show all around.

wow wow wow, i'm on a cloud. if you haven't seen this series, it slays.

love object

i saw the greatest movie on one of the movie channels last night, called Love Object. here's the plot summary from imdb:

The twisted tale of Kenneth, socially insecure technical writer who forms an obsessive relationship with "Nikki", an anatomically accurate silicone sex doll he orders over the Internet. Because of his experience with his new toy, Kenneth's life takes a turn for the better when his newfound romantic skills attract the attention of Lisa, a co-worker at his office. But when the doll's jealous personality invades his consciousness, Kenneth becomes trapped in a perverse triangle, torn between the dominating, silicone Nikki and the flesh-and-blood Lisa.

WATCH TRAILER

it's so disturbing in a funny way. it stars desmond harrington, who also played in wrong turn (another favorite of mine). in a way, it sort of reminded me of willard, in a social-reject-becomes-obsessed-with-(fill in the blank) and ends up going all psycho. i don't know, but instead of willard's rats, this is kenneth's sex doll. okay, haha, maybe they're not so similar. but both movies left me with the same feeling of horrified amusement.

this aint a mommy blog, but...

today's favorite conversations with davey, my 4 year old son...

me: davey, go clean your room.
davey: no
me: if you do, i'll give you a quarter.
davey: can you pay me in advance?

(davey bonks knee on toybox)
davey: OOOW!
me: whats-a-matter?
davey: my patella hurts.

sorry people. under all this awesomeness (ha), i'm still a mom.

wal-mart: matchmaker.

thanks to kev for this one:

NEW YORK (CNN/Money) - Just when you thought you'd heard it all from the king of discount shopping, Wal-Mart is now pitching itself as the new dating hot spot -- with everyday low prices to boot.

In fact, the Bentonville, Ark.-based retailer's been playing Cupid to hundreds of lonely single German shoppers for well over a year now.

According to Amy Wyatt, spokeswoman for the retailer's international operations, Wal-Mart's been running its "Singles Shopping" campaign in all of its 91 stores in Germany.

Here's how its works.

On Friday nights, singles looking for romance, mindless flirting or just a new friend head over to their neighborhood Wal-Mart where they're given a big bright red bow to attach to their shopping cart or shopping basket.

Then it's up to the willing participants to approach one another and take it from there.

READ MORE...


wow...creepy. apparently it's mostly middle aged to elderly. so, like grandma yells out "i'm heading over to the wal-mart to pick up some special k and a MAN..." ugh.

rediscovering twizzlers...

man, oh, man. i love me some twizzlers.

haven't had them in years. i mean, YEARS. it's funny how much the taste of an old friend can cheer me up. i've been in this AMAZING rut for the past...oh...i'd say 8 months. i was afraid this gigantic mood shift was something serious, for which i might need medication.

never underestimate the power of a simple strawberry chew.

so, anyway. i got the amityville horror collection today at wal-mart. hella, little did i know, it has a ticket to see the new remake of amityville horror coming out in theaters april 15. boing, that slays. i saw the trailer for it on tv and it looks so much more disturbing than the original. better effects, of course. and chances are, it'll have the demons or whatever moving all fast (oh, so scary).

really, it boggles the mind to think that some people don't like horror movies. i really don't understand this. there is nothing better than sitting in a dark theater among a sea of strangers, eating popcorn and getting the everloving begeezus scared out of me. BOOM!

... >:(

aw, man...dammit, i hate violent hiccups. ghaaaaaa*HIC*

y'know, as much as i hate paris hilton, i want her contacts. i never knew she had brown eyes (naturally). all the color contacts i've looked at for dark eyes never looked nearly that blue. it could be very cool and strange to look in the mirror and have blue eyes. hell, i change my hair color once a month. i think it's my eyes' turn.

aw, gawd, i'm rambling. a bit of nightmarish insight into what really goes on in my constantly distracted brain. but that's ok, it's my blog, so if you don't like it, fuck off.

but just make sure to comment first.

funny book covers

found these on Something Awful. these were some of my favorites, but you totally have to go look at all of them.

(click them, they'll get bigger)

a brand new bike! with training wheels!

no, not for me.

i got davey a schwinn thrasher bike the other day. he'll beg all morning to go ride bikes, but i won't let him go out alone (of course, he's only 4) and i won't go outside looking like i just woke up...at noon (so ashamed). so i get my shower, spiff myself up a little in order to go out in the front yard (haha) only to have davey ride the bike for 3 minutes. then he runs back inside to play game boy.

i need to get this boy to play outside more often. he's normally content to be cooped up in the house watching videos, playing spiderman dress-up, playing game boy, learning to read. but it's starting to seem unhealthy. instead of going out to play, he sits with me and talks about movie special effects or the skeletal system.

he went out to play with the neighbor girl (same age as him) yesterday, but he spent the entire time telling her not to do this and don't do that, it's bad. when she left the yard to go play by the trees, davey stood at the edge of the lawn yelling GET BACK HERE NOW! i have a feeling he'll end up being a hall moniter when he gets to school. and have no friends.

i'm such an 80's kid.

ah, gawd. i just saw this at butterfly dani. it's so true for me, it's scary.

You're an 80's kid if:

1. You ever ended a sentence w/ the word "SIKE"
2. You watched Pound Puppies
3. You can sing the rap to "Fresh Prince of Bel Air"
4. You wore biker shorts under your skirts and felt stylish.
5. You yearned to be a member of the babysitters club and tried to start one of your own.
6. You owned those lil Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.
7. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey on "Blossom"
8. Two words: M.C. Hammer
9. If you ever watched Fraggle Rock
10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars. (HELL YEAH!!!)
11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales"
12. It was actually worth getting up on Sat morning to watch cartoons
13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head
14. You saw "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" on the big screen
15. You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class.
16. You had a clip that held your shirt in a knot at the side
17. You played the game MASH (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House)
18. You wore a Jordache jean jacket and you were proud of it
19. L.A. Gear...need I say more
20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in kindergarten
21. You remember all of the Ramona books
22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF"
23. You wanted to be a Goonie
24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing (some head to toe)
25. You can remember what Michael Jackson REALLY looked like
26. You ever wondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf
27. You took lunch pals to school
28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets
29. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after every sentence
30. Barbie and the Rockers were your fav band
31. You thought She-Ra and He-Man should hook up
32. You thought your childhood friends would never leave you b/c you exchanged friendship bracelets
33. You ever owned a pair of jelly shoes (and probably in neon colors)
34. After Pee-Wee's Big Adventures you kept saying "I know you are but what am I"
35. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"
36. You remember skating before inline skates
37. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip-n-slide
38. You had a Skip-it
39. You had or attended a b-day party at Mc Donald's
40. You've gone thru this nodding your head in agreement
41. "Don't worry, Be happy!!"
42. You wore like 8 pair of socks over tights w/ high top Reeboks
43. You wore socks scrunched down
44. "Miss MARY MACK MACK MACK all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK"
45. Boom boxes vs. cd players
46. Both Gremlin movies
47. "CARE BEAR STARE!!!"
48. You remember Rainbow Bright and My Lil Pony Tales
49. You thought Doogie Howser was hot!
50. Alf, the furry brown alien from Melmac
51. New Kids On the Block when they were cool
52. Knew all the characters and their life stories on the ORIGINAL Saved by the Bell
53. Know all the words to Bon Jovi- SHOT THRU THE HEART
54. You just sang it to yourself
55. You remember when Mullets were cool
56. You tight rolled your pants
57. You owned a banana clip!

yeah. so, the pope died.

chick movie

i'm not the biggest fan of romantic comedies. i usually try to stick to weird and disturbing, as opposed to cute and girly. but while i was flipping around the movie channels last week or so, i stopped and watched part of 13 Going On 30. this was a movie i was so determined not to go see in the theaters. it was a cute girly chick movie. yuuuuuck.

well, i bought the dvd the other day. i adore it for some reason. i think 80% of the reason i like it is mark ruffalo. yums.

but anyways, it's a fun movie. it's got a mostly 80's soundtrack with artists like talking heads (burning down the house), the go-go's, micheal jackson (thriller), rick springfield, madonna, BILLY JOEL (vienna -- an awesome song), etc. gawd, i'm such a...chick. but it's one of those movies that makes you wanna hug a fluffy pillow.

---

on a different-ish note, i found a link on A World of Chaos to this kewl site that you type in your birth date and it will tell you the #1 song on that day either in the US or UK.

mine was My Sharona by The Knack.