I've become a downer over the last decade, which is about the same amount of time I've maintained this blog. It seems the more "good" things that happen in my life, the more shitty my personality becomes. I can't pretend to understand why. And I'm sorry. My mind is a poisonous place as of late, no matter what happens, I'm an insufferable asshole, incapable of chilling out and enjoying anything. I drink too much. I'm lazy and boring and stupidly predictable. I either irritate, offend, or just push away anyone I've ever loved. Trust me, though. I'm trying to figure it out. I'm human. Hopefully I'll outgrow this phase of being horrible to everyone around me.
1 comment:
Oh man do I know how you feel! To be completely honest with you, this is my first time on your blog. I haven't read any further (yet) than this post, but I totally can relate! I will be happy as larry in my head...totally grateful for my solid job/relationship/friends/future etc etc but then I will just be a complete asshole! an impatient, irritable, judgmental, snide, condescending dick! Don't be too hard on yourself, it's human nature. And I reckon we will figure it out. High five to us! x
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