jenny's antisocial behavior

i have this problem. i always wonder what people are thinking. i know this is something everyone does, probably every day, but i do it all the time. i stop and stare while people are talking and wonder "what are they really thinking? is it the same thing that is coming out of their mouth?" and then i wonder, "maybe they're really just talking to themselves and they need me there to keep up appearances that they're normal." i know i've caught myself doing that sometimes. it really confuses people.

and then i think, "what the hell did they just say, i was too busy wondering what they were thinking!" i get self conscious because, did it really look like i was listening or was i staring at them like a zombie? did they ask me a question and i didn't hear? aaagh, gawd!

and then i think "maybe they're wondering what i'm thinking? oh, crap, i hope not."

this is normally when i walk away.

i had this sort of conversation with the neighbor the other day. i have next to nothing in common with her, but our kids play together, and i think davey is in love with her daughter. i listened to her talking about the grass and sod and the kids' new toy lightsabers and blah blah blah....what is she thinking?

BOOM, i was lost in my head. i guess you could call it daydreaming. it's like when you go to bed and start to drift off to sleep. you start off thinking about normal things, then the thoughts veer off into random weird stuff. i felt myself smiling and nodding, but honestly i don't recall anything she said for about 3 minutes. until she said "...smelled like urine and vomit. snakes only poop once every few weeks."

what the fuck??

i snapped back to reality, but for the life of me, i can't tell you what led up to that. so instead of trying to continue the conversation, i said, "WELL...that's revolting..." and walked away.

the sad part? now i'm still trying to figure out how a conversation about lightsabers led up to snake poop. it just boggles the mind.