hamsters

ah, the power of negative thoughts.

if you think it, eventually it will come to pass. all the things we can't do. all the holes that are poked in the optimism of others but no solution to plug them with, every snide remark to cut down other people's hope only digs the hole further.

what we all need to do is just think positive and united and it will translate into action which in turn produces results. and i think it's...

...i just realized whenhamstersattack.com is actually a site...

what was i saying?

hm.

lately...

i've been exhausted. lucy alone takes up most of my time. but then i have david to take care of, i'm working outside the home, i've started babysitting a neighbor's son on weekdays and on top of that, i'm trying to keep the dishes and everybody's laundry done and the house clean.

it seems that any time i even think about blogging, lucy starts screaming or somebody needs me to do this or that or AAAAAAUGH, LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE. but i'm a mom, so i suppose that's way too much to ask. if something needs to be done, i'm the only one that can do it and it has to be done now.

even now, i'm trying to type one-handed with a fussy baby in the other arm. and i'm sadly watching my abandoned coffee getting cold.

life is FRUSTRATING.

let me finish this when the lucy-goose falls asleep...

*******

okay, well, i had her asleep. as soon as i put her in her playpen she woke up and squealed at me, but she's playing quietly, so i guess that works.

things always seem more hopeless with a screaming baby in your arms.

i made two resolutions this year. one is to lose hella weight. the other is to get back in touch with everyone i unintentionally shut out of my life for a year. as soon as my life started getting hectic, what with new baby and moving and surgery and family tragedies and on and on and on, i just either didn't have the time or patience to get online. which meant i left some people hanging that i didn't want to.

ok, i guess my time is up, lucy's crying.